


13 people added to 'family'

by ThirteenthMouse6572



Series: 13 people added to 'family' [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Aromantic Character, Aromantic Dino, Asexual Character, Asexual Dino, Genderfluid Jeonghan, LGBTQ Character, Multi, rated for language, texting au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2016-12-20
Packaged: 2018-09-09 23:11:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8916778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThirteenthMouse6572/pseuds/ThirteenthMouse6572
Summary: s.coups has added angel, joshua h, june, hOSH, ww, smol, pure man, tol, m8, sasskwan, dicaprio and dino to the group chats.coups named the group ‘family’----------that texting au nobody asked for but i was bored so here you go!





	

**Author's Note:**

> S.Coups: s.coups, papa coups  
> Jeonghan: angel, mama jeonghan  
> Jisoo: joshua h  
> Jun: june  
> Hoshi: hOSH  
> Wonwoo: ww  
> Jihoon: smol, satan  
> DK: pure man  
> Mingyu: tol  
> Minghao: m8  
> Seungkwan: sasskwan  
> Hansol: dicaprio, dicapriNO  
> Chan: dino, literal child

**s.coups has added angel, joshua h, june, hOSH, ww, smol, pure man, tol, m8, sasskwan, dicaprio and dino to the group chat**

**s.coups named the group ‘family’**

**angel:** im the mother no arguments

**joshua h:** okay first of all wow

**joshua h:** second of all wOW

**angel:** no arguments joshua

**s.coups:** you're in trouble

**joshua h has left ‘family’**

**angel has added joshua h to ‘family’**  
****

**angel:** you cant escape joshua  
****

**m8:** this chat just got made what happened

 **s.coups:** well…

**joshua h has set angel’s nickname to ‘r00d’**

**joshua h:** its because you are  
****

**r00d:** joshua hong i am your mother

 **joshua h:** we arent even related??

 **r00d:** i claimed the title first okay no arguments

 **tol:** what even is this chat tho

 **s.coups:** regret in it’s purest form

 **tol:** okay

 **tol:** i understand why

**r00d has set their own nickname to ‘angel’**

**angel:** i am an angel okay dont try to change the fact  
****

**joshua h:** seen 2:36pm

 **tol:** wait if jeonghan is the mother than is coups the father

 **angel:** yes!

 **s.coups:** no

 **angel:** why not??

**s.coups:** i regret making this chat already i am not being the father

**angel has set s.coups’s nickname to ‘papa coups’**

**papa coups:** why  
****

**angel:** because you are the father no backing out now

**papa coups has left ‘family’**

**tol has added s.coups to ‘family’**  
****

**tol has set s.coups’s nickname to ‘papa coups’**  
****

**tol:** you’re stuck here forever now deal w/ it  
****

**dino:** am i the child?

 **angel:** yes you are

 **dino:** okay

**dino has set their own name to ‘literal child’**

**literal child:** the child is here  
****

**hOSH:** HELLO

 **tol:** why are you yelling?

 **smol:** His phone is broken, so it only types in capital letters.

 **hOSH:** WHAT JIHOON SAID

**smol has set their own nickname to ‘grown man’**

**tol has set grown man’s nickname to ‘smol’**  
****

**smol:** I’m bitter  
****

**tol:** <3  
****

**papa coups:** i made this chat 5 minutes ago and minghao has already put it on mute  
****

**hOSH:** HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT??

 **june:** because he just pressed the home button on minghaos phone and there are no notifications

 **angel:** how nice of you to join us

 **june:** im following minghaos example and putting this chat on mute as well

 **june:** bye bye fuckers

 **joshua h:** there are chiLDREN HERE

 **literal child:** im old enough to know what swearing is

 **joshua h:** stILL

* * *

7:49 pm

 **m8:** actually im keeping this chat unmuted this is hilarious

 **june:** why would you do that

 **m8:** so i can /lurk/

 **june:** good idea

* * *

10:14 pm

 **ww:** i have so many questions

 **ww:** 1) why does this chat exist

 **ww:** 2) why am i awake

 **tol:** so you can cuddle me comE ON

 **ww:** coming

* * *

5:45 am

 **dicaprio:** whose alARM IS THAT

 **sasskwan:** and why is it set for this early

 **angel:** its mine sorry

 **dicaprio:** turn it oFF

 **angel:** that is no way to treat your mother

 **dicaprio:** i have no proof that you are my mother

**angel set their own nickname to ‘mama jeonghan’**

**mama jeonghan:** what about now?  
****

**dicaprio:** ……

 **dicaprio:** im going back to sleep

 **sasskwan:** you have to wake up in like an hour????

**dicaprio:** shut up

**mama jeonghan:** language!

 **dicaprio:** its not a swear word???

 **dicaprio:** like????

 **mama jeonghan:** get up

 **dicaprio:** w h y

 **mama jeonghan:** youre gonna help me with breakfast

 **dicaprio:** i t s 5 : 4 8 i n t h e m o r n i n g

 **mama jeonghan:** and im outside your room get up or else im going to break this door down

 **sasskwan:** its unlocked you can just walk in

 **dicaprio:** why would you tell them that!!!

 **dicaprio:** i dont have a shirt on!!!

 **dicaprio:** go away!!!

 **dicaprio:** also @ minghao and jun stop lurking

 **m8:** a b o r t

**june:** A B O R T

**sasskwan:** …

 **sasskwan:** what just happened

 **dicaprio:** i have no clue but jeoNGHAN IS IN MY ROOM AND THEYRE GONNA RIP OFF MY BLANKETS I DONT HAVE A SHIRT!!!

 **sasskwan:** why are you texting the group chat then

 **sasskwan:** how are you texting the group chat???

 **dicaprio:** with dificutly !!$

 **jun:** i just heard a thud from hansol’s room is he okay

 **mama jeonghan:** hes fine :)))

 **dicaprio:** jeonghan has trapped me in blankets and is now dragging me down the hallway towards the kitchen

 **m8:** i have so many pictures

 **mama jeonghan:** i saw that hansol

 **dicaprio:** fuck

 **mama jeonghan:** language!!

 **sasskwan:** what did he do

**m8:** flipped me off

**june:** dont be rood to my boyfriend

 **sasskwan:** im trying to sleep can you guys not

 **dicaprio:** yo @ jeonghan can you let me out of these blankets so i can put on a shirt

 **mama jeonghan:** no

**dicaprio:** i cant make breakfast s h i r t l e s s

**mama jeonghan:** i doubt /someone/ wouldnt argue against it

 **dicaprio:** PAPA COUPS

 **dicaprio:** dont ignore me i can see you reading these

 **papa coups:** what do you want

 **dicaprio:** mother is bullying me

 **papa coups:** i’m not disagreeing with them

 **dicaprio:** wOW

 **dicaprio:** R00D

 **mama jeonghan:** get up were making breakfast

* * *

 

 **literal child:** what happened hansol isn't in his bed and there are n o blankets

 **dicaprio:** jeonghan made me help them cook breakfast

 **literal child:** its like???

 **literal child:** 6:30 am???

 **dicaprio:** i k n o w

**mama jeonghan:** hansol get off the floor and help me make breakfast

**dicaprio:** i need a sh irt ?? ? ???

 **mama jeonghan:** no you dont come on

 **dicaprio:** s     i     g     h

 **mama jeonghan:** stop complaining

 **smol:** Turn off your alarm I am bitter

 **joshua h:** i did it for you

 **smol:** Thanks

 **joshua h:** yw

 **ww:** what happened here i just woke up

 **tol:** yes you also m o v e d get back here youre warm

 **smol:** You are all very gay.

 **hOSH:** YOU CANT TALK JIHOONIE

 **smol:** kwon soonyoung

 **hOSH:** WHOOPS

 **hOSH:** AUTOCORRECT

 **dicaprio:** j i h o o n i e

 **dicaprio:** this is amazing

 **smol:** kill list: 1) soonyoung 2) hansol

 **dicaprio:** f u c k

 **hOSH:** S H IT

 **pure man:** i hear yelling that is most definitely jihoon what is happening

 **pure man:** nvm i just read up

 **pure man:** ‘jihoonie’ oml

 **smol:** you should be on my side dk wtf

 **pure man:** sorry

 **pure man:** im coming stop killing hoshi i can hear him screaming

 **dicaprio:** MA M A JEON GHA N H E LP US

 **mama jeonghan:** this is v entertaining

**june has sent a picture to ‘family’**

**mama jeonghan:** did you just send a picture of kim taehyung from bts to the group chat  
****

**mama jeonghan:** because that raises so many questions

 **june:** v

 **mama jeonghan:** yes but /why/ do you have that picture on your phone?

 **dicaprio:** HE LP M E

 **smol:** GET BACK HERE CHWE HANSOL

 **dicaprio:** F U C K

 **literal child:** oh hi hansol

 **dicaprio:** h i d e m e

**joshua h has set dicaprio’s nickname to ‘diCRAPrio’**

**diCRAPrio has set their own nickname to ‘dicapriNO’**  
****

**joshua h:** thats pretty good  
****

**joshua h:** i approve

 **dicapriNO:** thanks

 **dicapriNO:** also cHAN MAKE SURE SATAN DOESNT COME IN HERE

 **literal child:** how am i supposed to do that

 **dicapriNO:** l e a n o n t h e d o o r

 **pure man:** did jihoon just hit the door

 **smol:** I tried to open it at the same time as I ran into it but that failed

 **smol:** My arm hurts now

 **dicapriNO:** haha karma bitch  
****

**dicapriNO has set smol’s nickname to ‘satan’**

**satan has set dicapriNO’s nickname to ‘asshole’**  
****

**asshole has set their own nickname to ‘dicapriNO’**  
****

**satan:** I am bitter  
****

**hOSH:** CAN I CUDDLE YOU

 **satan:** You’ve lost cuddling privileges for a week

 **hOSH:** A W E E K ? ? ? ? ? ?

 **satan:** I am bitter

 **dicapriNO:** tbt to jihoonie

**dicapriNO has set satan’s nickname to ‘j i h o o n i e’**

**j i h o o n i e:** I preferred satan much more  
****

**dicaprioNO:** but jihoonie…

 **j i h o o n i e:** Somebody help me I am very bitter

 **mama jeonghan:** ill be there in a minute

 **mama jeonghan:** joshua! perfect timing!

 **joshua h:** nope im not here get someone else

 **mama jeonghan:** can you make sure this toast doesn’t burn

 **joshua h:** f i n e

 **mama jeonghan:** i will cuddle you jihoonie!!!

 **j i h o o n i e:** dont you fucking dare yoon jeonghan

 **mama jeonghan:** :(((((

 **j i h o o n i e:** DK help me please

 **pure man:** okay!

 **literal child:** hansol is underneath his bed and refuses to come out help me

 **dicapriNO:** im not leaving unless im sure jihoonie has left and will not attack me

 **j i h o o n i e:** im gonna attack you unless you stop calling me that name

 **dicapriNO:** …

 **dicapriNO:** f i n e

**j i h o o n i e has set their own nickname to ‘satan’**

**satan:** I’ll forgive you if you come and cuddle me on this couch because I am still bitter  
****

**hOSH:** WHAT YOU LET HIM CUDDLE YOU BUT NOT YOUR BOYFRIEND W O W

 **hOSH:** R U D E

 **dicapriNO:** actually its spelt r00d with zeros

 **hOSH:** SHUT YOUR MOUTH

 **literal child:** hansol just pushed past me and opened the door and s p r i n t e d down the hallway towards the couch

 **satan:** He then tried to jump over the couch but he got stuck so he landed on the back of the couch and then proceeded to roll ON TOP OF ME and then I pushed him off the couch so he is now groaning while rolling on the floor in the small space between the coffee table and the couch

 **m8:** rip

**june:** rip

**joshua h:** rip

 **pure man:** rip

 **satan:** R.I.P

 **mama jeonghan:** rip

**hOSH:** RIP

**literal child:** rip

**papa coups:** rip

**ww:** rip

 **tol:** rip

 **sasskwan:** rip

 **dicapriNO:** fuk you all

 **m8:** <3

 **june:** <3

 **joshua h:** <3

 **pure man:** <3

 **satan:** <3

 **mama jeonghan:** <3

 **hOSH:** <3

 **literal child:** <3

 **papa coups:** <3

 **ww:** <3

 **tol:** <3

 **sasskwan:** <3

 **dicapriNO:** this is creepy

 **dicapriNO:** its literally the sAME ORDER WHAT

 **dicapriNO:** fuck this im going to bed

 **mama jeonghan:** language!

 **satan:** It’s literally almost 7??

 **dicapriNO:** g o o d b y e

**Author's Note:**

> i'll attempt to update these every tuesday and thursday so yeah  
> thanks for reading <3


End file.
